I know you’ve been there, too. There’s something in the pantry that your spouse or kids brought home (or maybe you did it yourself in a moment of weakness) and it’s calling to you. You know it would taste delicious, but you also know it’s not on your plan for getting to your health goals. UGH! Who wants to tell themselves “No” in this situation? Hmmm. I see no hands raised there in the audience. Just what I suspected. Me either!
But telling ourselves No is a way of practicing “discipline,” which Webster’s defines as “control gained by obedience or order.” “Control.” Wow. Who out there needs a little more control in their relationship with food? (Oh yes, I’m seeing more hands raised in the audience now!) I know I do. And how do we get there? It’s gained through our “obedience” Webster’s tells us. Obedience to what? Well, first to yourself. You’re the one who recognized that you need a boundary and determined this forbidden food is not “on your plan.” If that’s the case, then honor yourself and your boundary. UGH! You say. That is not fun! That is not delicious! That is not delightful. Believe me, friend, I know. Hear me out.
There is a bigger payoff than “delicious” in telling ourselves No. One of the truest verses of the Bible I’ve found is Hebrews 12:11 which says, “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.” Friends, I have to tell you: it is definitely not “pleasant” to log my day’s meals into my food tracker and realize I’m beyond my calorie goal and must decline dessert. And it is not pleasant to tell myself I can’t buy that cute thing I want from my favorite retailer because I’m over budget for the month. As much as I recognize I have to live within my boundaries, that I have to tell myself I can’t cross that line in order to stay “safe,” let me just say the writer of the Hebrews verse ain’t kidding: This is “painful”!
But later! Oh, but later! After practicing telling myself No a few times, it gets a little easier. And then after a few more times of saying this short but powerful word, I begin to see the promise of what Hebrews talks about: “a harvest of righteousness and peace.” I say No to the Free Donuts at Work and eat the healthy snack I brought. I say No to the drive-thru and make dinner at home instead. I say No to the snooze button and hit my morning workout. And the Righteousness and Peace? What does that look like? Better yet, what does it feel like? I can tell you that after nearly two years of practicing saying “NO” to the things that used to trip me up, the monologue in my brain is nicer. It is not filled with as many regrets, it is not about beating myself up for poor choices I made. And when my brain isn’t running on that track, there is more space in my head for the good, the positive. And that provides me with peace.
No, it doesn’t happen overnight. But it happens with practice. Time and again. Little by little. You know, poco a poco.
